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Nach einer knappen Woche Absenz wieder ein wenig Zeit zum Gedanken machen


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One man down, he had to fall,
I hear a last and desperate call,
his will to live at last was strong,
but circumstances had been wrong,
a senseless war the time had claimed,
if he had known 'bout what remained,
I guess his time he'd never wasted,
don't care, eternity is pasted.

His soul, now free, deserved to flee,
I wish that he'll enjoy to be
the unbound, roaming consciousness,
that maybe will assess the mess.
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7.4.05 23:05, kommentieren

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Restricted insight, words denied,
my thoughts are silently applied,
but no response and no reaction,
freezy feels this strange infection,
what has happened, tell me dear,
togetherness is reigned by fear,
and rain falls on my ceilings top,
each one of them feels like my teardrop.
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1 Kommentar 8.4.05 16:55, kommentieren

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Wo hat sich mein Herz verloren,
ist's vielleicht schon neugeboren,
hab' ich etwa ganz verschlafen,
dass sich uns're Wege trafen,
oh', verzeih'n sie, sind sie nicht
die Frau die nun mein Herze richt',
scheint zwar verwundert doch war's die,
nun, gute Frau, ich liebe sie.
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It might come, I'm not afraid,
of misery after darkness' raid,
so often strucked by cruelty,
that I'm immune, won't torment me.
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8.4.05 23:55, kommentieren

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This feeling to be loved again
means healing for my conscious' den.
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9.4.05 22:23, kommentieren

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Love now calls for sacrifice,
my heart gets misused like a dice,
don't fool me, did it once or twice,
maybe that my soul turns to ice.
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Ein Blick durchbricht die lichte Wand,
das Herz begreift dein Wortgewand,
und sp?rt darunter eine Leere,
was wenn drunter Liebe w?re.
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One day I thought that it was right,
to start resistance, open fight,
so much in world consists of mischief,
trust in greenly misbelief.
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11.4.05 15:30, kommentieren

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Ist es denn zuviel verlangt,
dass all der Schmerz, auf mich gebannt,
nur kurz von mir l?sst, sorgenfrei,
dass endlich ich dann gl?cklich sei.
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Warum muss ich nach eurer Welt
mich richten, so bin ich umstellt
von euren Pflichten, eurem Abstand,
ich geh' unter wie in Treibsand.

Wieso muss ich der euren Welt
mich f?gen, wenns mir nicht gef?llt
s'ist alles wichtig, nur nicht ich,
wie soll ich leben, sag's mir, sprich.
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11.4.05 21:41, kommentieren

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Cold and silent rests the plan,
that we've made when all began,
I won't believe in foolish fate,
why come these feelings now, too late?
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12.4.05 23:25, kommentieren

Inspired by a movie-night


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I wish you were here,
'cause I'm full of fear,
alone in the dark,
of fantasy's park.
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16.4.05 23:38, kommentieren

Die Schule... Zwar bald draussen und die letzten Jahre eigentlich nurmehr wegen der Leute hingegangen, aber doch irgendwie gemischte Gef?hle im R?ckblick....
Kann man ja unten nachlesen.
Na dann, mal sehen wie's ohne die Leute und Schule oder zumindest gro?teils ohne diese wird


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It's time now fades, outrunning days,
I'll ever be a kind of trace,
effeteness marks my weary face,
I wish that I can soon replace.

One last time I raise my gaze,
the lore of mine still jammed by haze,
but soon there'll be no further chase,
by what my true self here betrays.
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17.4.05 23:07, kommentieren

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Ich zweifle stark an seinem Grund,
was heisst es schon, zu sein gesund,
Ich bin gesund, mehr als zuvor,
was noch, schiess' los, ich bin ganz Ohr!
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19.4.05 20:56, kommentieren

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Seht ihr nicht dass sie betr?gen,
wollt ihr euch den L?gen f?gen,
seid ihr denn zu dumm zum sehen,
wie sie drehen, Wege gehen,
euch benutzen, ohne stutzen,
um mit euch ihr Gut zu putzen,
blickt euch um, setzt Widerstand,
denn alles liegt in eurer Hand.
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20.4.05 01:31, kommentieren

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All you see is black or white,
and nothing but a wrong or right,
now, note that there is always reason,
don't you judge by mood and season.
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20.4.05 13:52, kommentieren

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I fear this room,
'cause it means gloom,
and dread this bed,
enchains my head,
descry my inside,
help decide,
how can I be,
I'm missing thee,
devoid my cure,
my conscience, pure,
but not it's guise,
infectious lies,
I'll soon break free,
thy light mends me,
since I am blind,
thus will not find,
salvation, clear,
and voidly fear.
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So, viele Gedanken auf einmal und mit vielen tollen Vokabeln... ich liebe Englisch

20.4.05 23:05, kommentieren

Krankheiten schlagen auf's Gem?t, deshalb bitte nicht zu Ernst nehmen

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In diesen W?nden wird es enden
hoff' ich trage bald zu Grabe
was mich sticht als w?r' es Pflicht
stets neues Leid woimmer ihr seid,
einmal noch schreit die Krankheit
schweig, ich geb' dem Heil den Fingerzeig
erl?s' mich endlich, flehentlich,
denn ich will fort an ihren Ort.
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20.4.05 23:39, kommentieren

Nachdem sich aufregen ja selten was bringt, will ich jetzt garnicht irgrndwelche w?sten Fl?che oder sonstwas von mir geben... schad ist's und an einem ?u?erst schlechten Zeitpunkt, blockiert durch Schnupfen und Kopfweh...

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Total breakdown, I collapse,
so insecure of plagues depth,
how long it might take, to forsake
my guise, but still soul cries a lake.
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21.4.05 11:25, kommentieren

"So tell me, what did you see there? Was it a dream?"
"No, Lazarus, it was so confusing... if I had not known better I'd say I'm insane, but things happened exactly the same way as they are supposed to here and everything felt so real... so, how can I describe a feeling that has ever been unknown, so pure, truly unaltered. That place himself seemed to morph, it steadily varied it's surface, but not even from outside... it even changed it's consistence. It was a fantastic and amazing place or planet, or world or dream, whatever it might have been. It's like seeing your thoughts, feelings, deepest wishes and heart desires compensating in your very proximity. All that you were and all that you can ever wish to be.. just a thought, my good friend, and it would happen. Could it have been paradise? Tell me, 'cause if so, I would die for returning there. Are we detained, my friend?"

Parts of a story, neither commenced nor ever ended.

1 Kommentar 24.4.05 22:16, kommentieren

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I can't say wether she was asleep or awake when I entered our room. However she lay with eyes opened in the den made of the sheet on the bed. By thinking back, it appeared to me as if she had fallen into a coma or something like that, staring and gazing through me and the rest of the world as if travelled into another one, dreaming a silent daydream and fading away. Wherever you're travelling, my dear, wish you a better time there.

I left through the door and it felt like entering a different "here and now", how can I describe it, I don't know that strange thought more exactly at all. It was like standing aside myself, watching from outside and then leaving the body behind and exploring the environment without being bound to my dull senses. It's not that I didn't feel anything at all, but just know it, always present sensory perceptions you don't have to collect first but already know and feel them anytime you want to. Strange thing, tell you that.
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Where have you been? A bit late, you see, it's half past over. Not too late, at least. But we have to hurry up, time is running out, it won't wait for us if we're blind to see the right path.
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3 Kommentare 25.4.05 22:42, kommentieren

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